The Poppy Appeal is one of those great annual galvanizing giving moments in the UK…it commands an almost universal appeal and a wave of goodwill.  So, knocking on doors for cash and giving a poppy to wear, compete with collections in the street, through shops and via text, mail, TV and online. But its the transaction of cash that remains fascinating. An exchange of human nature, an almost forced moment now of human contact. It’s difficult to find cash collectors, but it teaches us a lot about ourselves and the people whose support we need. So, after 90 minutes door to door here are my 7 lessons and insights.

1. Say more than thank you….say how kind that is, how much you appreciate the gift, a heartfelt thanks whatever the sum

2. Concentrate and celebrate the kind ones, move on from the self obsessed and can’t be bothered

3. Give a bit more….I found myself giving out 2 or 3 poppies in case they lost one…people sort of liked that….

4. But make sure it’s not seen as waste. People want to make their gift have impact and not be spent on anything other than that impact

5 Leave something behind…I left a poppy at each door of those who weren’t at home, the next time they see a tin, they are more likely to give

6. Take a gift aid declaration. two people asked me for this as they wanted to maximise their giving. There must be a better way of making the most of this?

7. If they want to chat….listen, ask and understand….

As we can easily hide behind social media, direct mail and e-mail there’s sometimes no better way to reconnect now and then by stomping the streets and knocking on doors…..maybe all fundraisers should have a go at least once a year….but always, always shut the gate….

There are some events that bind us all together. The assassination of JFK, the landing on the moon, the death of Diana and the one event that changed this century – 9/11.

The question, “where were you when…” is based on our common experience. A shared point of reference, but an emotional insight about ourselves and about each other. We all remember the moment when we heard of the horror unfolding. The subsequent shock and disbelief. The grief. The anguish. I was, like most others, fixed on a TV screen at our office having heard the news in the car as I drove back with a colleague. When the towers fell, we all left, wanting to be with our families. The impact, the memory, the enormity and the emotion was, as it was for most, deep and lasting. 10 years on and the question ‘where were we when’ is the embrace that holds us all together around those moments.

Sometimes the big event, strung together by the connected world of news and communications, hides the quiet, ordinary events that we forget, discount or ignore. What if, at a time of such collective memory, we stopped and gave permission to touch those small moments we may have lost? Here are 20 where were you when’s to remind you of the ordinary stuff that passes us by that is so easy to forget. Why not start a different where were you when conversation….?

Where were you when….

1. You had your first kiss….2. You saw the best ever sunset..3. You climbed your highest mountain..4. You first saw Star Wars.!!..5. You heard that someone you loved had died…6. You decided to take your first job….7. You made your first regular gift….8. You first saw a fax come through…9. You did your first radio or TV interview…10. You made your biggest mistake…11. You realised that x was the love of your life…12. You knew what you wanted to be in life…13. You had your first drink in a pub… 14. You did the thing you are most proud of..15. You first went to the opera.. 16. You gave the best gift you ever made … 17. You did your worst ever karaoke performance..18. You did your personal best at your favourite sport….19. You last said I love you and really meant it…20. You decided to take the lead and not follow.

Where were you when, doesn’t have to be bad or big…..but it should mean something….

There are plenty of examples of everyone telling people stuff. Sometimes we listen. Sometimes we tune out. Most the time we simply can’t hear well enough and move on to the next shiny thing. It’s hard to listen…really listen. And I bet donors, colleagues and family feel, whoever we are, it’s not enough. We once had a listening exercise in some training we did for fundraising staff. Just to spend some time working on hearing what someone else was really saying, was in itself a revelation. It was deliberate. Conscious. Active.

So, with summer here and a fraction more room than normal, check out Julian Treasure’s excellent TED video on 5 ways to listen better….sorry, what did you say…..?

The village charity committee wanted to hold a meeting to plan the summer event. In one of the pubs, the secretary asked the bar staff if they could use their room (they have used it before). The bar staff told her it would cost £10. Now given that there are 10 on the committee at an average of each spending £4 on the night in the bar, that’s £40 in a midweek when, let’s be honest most pubs are empty. If you add the good will, the reputation, and the fact that it’s a local charity doing good for THEIR community and you start to get a bit lost why they would charge £10.

Anyway, the pub was challenged. £10? Really? No shift? No? Fine said the charity secretary,  ”We’ll go to the King Bill then” “Oh well” said the pub “up to you”.

Yep. It is up to you. So they went somewhere else, and told everyone how miserably they were treated. It could have been so different  - just a little bit of judgement, a little bit of investment, a little bit of common sense, a little bit of kindness, a better view of the bigger picture – that’s all that was required to create 10 happy people spending in your place and telling nice tales about you.

There is one small gift in this and one big lesson. It teaches us all that value is always above price.

You Can’t Take it With You, with business guru Sir Gerry Robinson and legal expert Sue Medders, helps bring families together to write their wills and face difficult challenges and decisions. Ranging from favouritism, to boys versus girls, to step families, to judgements about people’s lifestyles to old-fashioned prejudice, Sir Gerry has talked – and listened to them all. Included in this is the charity dilemma or decision – if its even on the radar. Its something we know about only too well.

It’s an interesting window on the attitudes of those who wrestle with such family dilemmas. The key to this programme rests with the exploration of a subject most wont talk about. Given the clashes (albeit lined up to create good tv) you can see why for many this is somewhere they don’t want to go. We know about family and friends first, charity second…its at the heart of the Remember a Charity campaign. The programme also prompts some thoughts about how charities could work more proactively with these insights and help make a positive contribution to these dilemmas. Here is my list of challenges, ideas and thoughts that we might consider…

1. Lets champion a service that helps families decide for themselves – not as a legal service, as a gift. Why don’t we offer a ’round table’ service to talk? A Relate for legacies?

2. Do we all give a clear set of expectations about how we will deal with a gift, what charities role is, what we have to do, and what we want to do to help the donor ort family – to reassure, to give confidence.

3. Can we give more to help executors? An online training course?

4. Do we promote the Fundraising Promise in our legacy materials?

5. Do we champion a donors charter that puts them first and us second?

6. Can we create a new consistent language when we talk that joins up the marketing and legacy administration side of donors charity experience?

7. Is there an ombudsman or the like that we can use to settle disputes?

8. Can we get the Big Society agenda to recognise the importance of charity legacies and help make it a social norm? How do we make it central to the Giving green paper?

9. What if we made everyone in charities able to talk about legacies….normally

10. A solicitor/will maker charter for charity support – a pledge to ask if people will leave a gift in their will, a professional committment to charities

You definitely can’t take it with you…but unless you talk about it……

I once saw a job description for a fundraiser that was 7 pages long. The only thing they didn’t want to know in the person spec was their DNA.

Pages of specifics are not what’s required to find a great fundraiser. In the map we think we build for ourselves of roles, tasks, descriptions, specifications, must have’s and desirables its easy to get lost in what really matters. Some of us need the comfort of a checklist. Others find the flush of instinct and the flutter of your heart is all that’s needed. We wrestle with the experienced but frankly wrong candidate , the inexperienced and still wrong candidate and the bright spark of hope,  with no experience but all the potential. When we look at them do we see the example we want to see, the moment of warmth yet determination, the getting it bit, the confidence they can run and walk and stop when they need to and to move something on, to not just deliver but exceed?. Do we see the conscientious individual – able to wash up at the end of the evening rather than leave someone else with the mess? Some will score on the list. Some will score in the heart. Some will score in both.

Take a step back and secretly write down this list. If you are looking for a great fundraiser do you see these qualities? Some or all? A good mix maybe? The potential? The core that fits your team and the talent you can build with. And if you are a fundraiser or want to be, do you see these qualities in you? How would you make them shine?

So here are my 10 essential qualities of a great fundraiser…

1. An inspirer- understands, harnesses and uses passion, connected to the cause, has a vision and a light
2. An artist – sees the role and themselves as art, a beautiful thing, crafted and enjoyed
3. An organiser – of themselves and others and gets things done, plans, see ahead, in front and behind, on time , records stuff that matters
4. An interpreter – translates needs, desires and language to make things possible, hears more than speaks
5. A connector – brings people together, finds networks, connections, openings, opportunities
6. A story-teller – captivating others with the art of telling and listening to stories, collects them, writes them, speaks them
7. A critic – curious, able to question, analyse, enquire, improve and refine
8. A coach – helps make people and things better, helps others and themselves
9. A collaborator – a team member, a gang member, a player, adds to the power of being together
10. A builder – practical, does the job, like to roll their sleeves up , then take a step back, lean on the shovel and smile with pride

It’s a simple list. It’s not rocket science. It’s not DNA. Its human.

Happy new year!!

On the 12th day of christmas, my true love gave to me…..well how about 12 christmas fundraising wishes…12 aspirations, 12 challenges.

On the first day of christmas (etc etc etc)…..so here goes…..

1. More investment in fundraising… in the sector, in charities & board level, by fundraising leadership and CEO’s who get what it takes and are prepared to argue for it

2. Better fundraising educated CEO’s and charity leadership..there’s not enough basic understanding of fundraising by some key leaders. It’s an engine at the heart of the business of charity, and ought to demand, in some cases, a little more respect, appreciation and support.

3. Everyone able to tell story’s about their cause – wouldn’t it be great if everyone involved was able (and allowed) to tell stories, use social media, not to have to get approval in triplicate because they were so good at it, it was pointless…

4. The sector standing up for giving – a leader in the big society - what if we seized the day, banged the drum for giving, led the debate, put fundraising at the heart of change, created a new social marketing campaign, a new giving campaign that created a new age of philanthropy..

5. A bigger pool of talented people - Talent that listens, learns, respects, trains, shares and makes things happen, stirs it up a bit …lots of ‘em, wanting to make an impact

6. Deeper insight, through research – how about more sector research, deeper meaning and insight, the true psychology of the donor relentlessly pursued, funded and part of all our everyday mission

7. Outward facing – not internal facing – donor led brands, organised to delight, to deliver experience and inspiration, focused on the real world, not around the water cooler or the internal brand guidelines handbook

8. More collaboration – working together on stuff that makes sense together. Building on Remember a Charity, let’s get some powerful alliances that make a real impact, save money in the process and advances our work so we can advance our causes – together

9. Creating a new community - blending traditional and online, face to face and social media, creating a new era of real, deep emotionally satisfying engagement that has impact locally and globally. 19th century meets 21st.

10. Better integration - No more silos. No more boxes without keys. Objectives, approach, strategy and delivery all joined up. Donor experience complete. Impact and value to the cause amplified

11. No more corporate insecurity – I wish, oh I wish we could have more confidence in our abilities. We can be business like but not a business. There is a difference. If you don’t get the difference we risk becoming just a machine. The worst of both worlds instead of the best of both. Make the leap to our world – not the other way round.

12. Ambition, ambition, ambition - Small charities are fine. Small minds aren’t. Big charities are fine. Small ambition isnt. We can do much more. Much, much more.

Think about it. Happy new year!!!